twenty nine; WELL

I shuvled!

I did a shitty job in the front.
REALLY SHITTY
but aw well, it's alll ice under there anyway, so ya know..

Is it sad that i miss my neighbour and her baby?

I MISS THEM SO FUCKING MUCH OH MY GOD.
That baby and her cheeks and the way she talks, just, awww.
Neighbour got a boyfriend.
Maybe they'll want some "time" and i could babysit the baby for her.
I miss that kid.
ugggh.

Got my report card.
Two A's (Thanks Mr C for being so kick ass.)
One B
a C+ that was two percent off from a B *frustration*

I should probably E-mail my aunty.
Hmmm.

My mom was suppose to get off at Five?
And she still hasn't called?
Whatttttt?


I think Veronica is mad at me again.
Whoooo.

I'm listening to Demons by Brian McFadden
Oh my god. Love.

Britt is cutting.
I think i posted that already.
But she admitted to it the other day.
i'm going to tell a teacher.
I wrote a letter and intend on telling him.
This is going to take some serious hypothetical balls.
AND GO.

My doggy has been with me all day.
She makes me happy.

I need a boy in my life.
Someone to cuddle with.
To make me feel loved.
To make me feel pretty.

SPEAKING OF PRETTY
some guy yesterday said i had a nice smile

"Hi"
"Hi"
"You have a nice smile!"
"Thanks!"
"Thank YOU!"
I wish he was younger.
But i still felt pretty good 'cause of that.

Twenty Eight; Why am i so upset?

Tyler told me he can't talk to me anymore.

He has a girlfriend
i was all "ummm, okkk?"

But something about it upset me.
WHO KNOWS WHAT
i'm cool now, ya know. Whatever.
It's not like i'm surprised, or that it's something completely out of the blue.
Maybe it's 'cause he said him talking to me again was a mistake.
Maybe i'm just hormonal.

NOTE TO WORLD
do NOT fucking turn my god damn light on in the morning.
Why?

IT PUTS ME IN ONE FUCKING PISSY MOOD.
yea.

I got downstairs today, feeling kinda pretty.
I was in a dress thing that i felt cute in.
I had my hair done.
Make up nicely done.
And i come downstairs to "Isn't that a little short?"
YOU KNOW WHAT. FUCK YOU I HAD TIGHTS ON.
Then i lean over to give my dog a pet and get told to go change.
I mean, i'm all cool with that.
I don't want to seem like a whore.
BUT YA KNOW WHAT.

I FELT PRETTY.
and then.. it was shot down by finding out my outfit was too short.

THEN VERONICA IS ALL "BOO HOO HOO"

you know what?

I'm about up to HERE with her fucking bullshit.
She really needs to learn to grow the fuck up.
SHE LEFT BITE MARKS ON MY GOD DAMN FINGER.
so maybe i had it coming.
But who honeslty bites people when someone says "Bite me"
i mean, i honestly had nothing else to say.
Other than "QUIT FUCKING TELLING ME TO SPEED UP"

i think i may start just.. walking kinda by myself
bring my CD player since i'm a nerd and my iPod doesn't work anymore.

I miss my aunty.
I wish i could tell her everything.
I mean everything.
Right down to the online dudes that catch my eye.
Oh man, i hope that doesn't come out in counselling.
I mean, i don't want to start balling and bring things up off the internet.
Imagine how that'd go?
"Maybe you should take a break from the internet."
"maybe it's a good thing this all happened. maybe you shouldn't be online."
Uh nuh.

I neeeed a life.
Luckily, they said they'd talk about my anxiety, and possibly dad.
But then Paul would be dragged in. Which would drag in how they met.
Which may drag in how i was involved..
or maybe i'll just say "Over the internet"

and that'll be that.
Mmm. i HOpe so.

I'm such an over reacter.

I NEED TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO HELP BRITTANY

I REALLY WANT PICKLES

I REALLY WANT A BOY.
Dear me, what i'd do for a boy.
someone to cuddle with.
Ugh.

I need a male in my life that i can love and be loved by.
Have threaten any guy that hurts me.
That's not my brother. (Unless it's Chad or Schyler)
Man. I think i have a problem.

THAT'S MY LIFE FOR NOW.