Fifteen; Ok, don't post. that's cool.

I went and hung out with Bradie and Lane (and Kiersten, for all of like.. an hour maybe)
LOADS of fun.

We stayed at Lane's till 3am.

I wasn't suppose to go sleep over at Bradie's house, but her mom gave in.

We called people between 2-3
people are seriously stupid. SHUT YOUR PHONES OFF.
if you know cruel people such as our selves.

Next day we went back to Lane's, hung out there for awhile
then walked to mcdonalds spent like an hour or two there
started walking back, but then we sat down on a bike road and waved at cars driving by.
105 people made some form of notion towards our waving.

3 gave us the middle finger
5 honks
the rest waves
prettttyy good.

then we walked back to Bradie's, i got my stuff and left
got home, called my mom
She was pissed that i didn't call her to tell her i was going to be spending the rest of the day with Bradie.
Fuck, Corban never calls and never gets in shit
i see how it is.
(i'm the loved one)
then the next day mom got all pissy with me again
i didn't talk to her till like
12 today
civily, without my "yea whatever" voice.

WHICH BRINGS ME TO TODAY
we spent it at the river
where water from the Kootenay lake and ... some other one mix
i rolled around in the mud like a pig.

go me?

burnt my arm i think.
mhm.

then we got home after hanging out there
life went on
6:30-8 rolled around
And i dozed in and out of conscious ness on the couch
i couldn't sleep last night
i normally don't take naps
i must have been REAL tired.

fourteen; I feel like i'm missing something, something big.

I have no clue as to what it is, though.

I'm still scared for my dog

We went to the lake today, it's October fest so there was A LOT of early-mid 20 year old people there. One guy kept grinning at me. He seemed like a really sweet guy, even though i hardly spoke with him. Aw well.

As it turns out, i was thinking of the wrong grandma.
I could wear black to the funeral!

so i did

and..

for the record

i felt very over dressed.

Maybe i'm just overly emotional today..

yea

maybe it was the heat too

since i'm burnt again..

lets just hope that it's that..

thirteen; To be honest.

I'm horrified.

I'm horrified of my dog dying

It scares me

she's going to bed really early

and becoming more and more tired

i want to cry everynight when she goes into her bed and i go to mine

i want to keep her with me, so she doesn't die alone.

I'm scared.

GRAH

tomorrow at two is Kylan's grandma's funeral.

since they're of a.. different.. origin, per say, i don't know if i should wear all black or not.

I'm going to anyway, i hope i don't offend anyone.

I have a few all black outfits i could wear

but all of them look more like.. Party outfits, not a funeral

lace kind of shirt and a black skirt.

Hope it will do.

I'm scared for my dog

i'm scared for my mom

i'm scared for my grandma

i'm scared for my life

i'm scared for my house

i'm just down right scared.

Why can't i worry about things that a normal teenager has to worry about?

Like whether or not my boyfriend is going to break up with me

or if i'm going to have enough minutes/texts

I'm so scared.

twelve; What do you tell an eight year old?

I asked Breanna if she'd like to talk to grandma because she'd love to say goodnight.

She was crying, saying she missed dad.

What do i say? "Do you think you can talk to her, she'd love to talk to you"

she shook her head.
FUCKING BAD SISTER, am i.

i came downstairs to continue talking to grandma, who was suppose to hang up like a half hour prior. AT LEAST

i should be up there with her. Ugh.

Some guy came and threatened Petite, asshat.
he pissed me off soo much!
i mean he's a stupid fucking ass
grahhhh

Going to the lake tomorrow, i'm pretty sure.

Wayne's son is here, Kaylin (how ever it's spelled), weird guy.

Eleven; First day of Summer School!

And i nearly got one unit finished! WHOO!
I'm going to class with this guy mom works with, who, for the record, she doesn't like.
Wonder if he'll reconize me..

I don't like getting up early to get ready for school.. in the summer.. i mean, it's so.. annoying!
NOTE TO SELF: Always eat before going to class. You get very hungry when you don't eat.
I'm going to look into a bus pass; cut my travle time in half, i'm sure.

Kylan's grandma ended up dying. May she RIP
We were told we were wanted at the funeral.
I have no problem with that, and i would be delighted to show my respects for such a wonderful woman.

Ten; Hey, dad, can I ask you a favour?

Welcome Kylan's grandma. Be kind to her.
Kylan's a friend of mine and my brother's, his grandma is probably going to pass away today/tomorrow. Kylan asked her to say hi to my dad.. Made my brother cry.
Super sweet old lady. It's always the nice ones.
FUCK OFF 2010. So many people i've known have died this year, or something tragic has happened to someone.

Turns out registration is tomorrow. Apparently we had to make appointments? Who knew.
10:15 AM, i think so!

A bird got stuck in my house today, that was a treat gettin' 'er out.

I feel horrible. I want to cry. I can't cry.
I wish I knew her better, i truely do.
I know she was a very sweet woman that had a huge heart.
But that's about it..
DAMN DAMN DAMN
we were told if we want we can go up to the hospital and say goodbye. Mom doesn't want to because she's sick (I guess she doesn't want to infect the hospital, i don't know.. everyone's sick there anyway... DON'T GIVE ME THAT TONE OF "you fucking idiot")

i'm so damn selfish.

Nine; Registration today!

That's right! Summer school registration, whooo! *very sarcastic*
I have two friends going in, but they both hate each other. It will be fun to see how this goes.
School starts tomorrow so i'll find out sooner than later.. Lovely.
Facebook is being a bitch, right now. Won't load a single thing!
After mom gets home from work this afternoon we're going to go get me a math book and stuff.
Hm, oh, I met this girl from Finland on Omegle last night, she seems to be a lot like me. Which. i don't know if that's good or not.
Aw well.
I found a whole wack load of new music! Hello 7,000 songs and counting. I'm still wondering where my "Recently Added" playlist went on iTunes.. It's very upsetting.